Drudgery, day after day the same old thing.
We think it is an external condition. It is not.
It is sloth and torpor.
Sloth and torpor, the inactive lazy mind
and body are hindrances to self-
realization. These two mind-body
states set up a roadblock to self-realization
and delay the release from dukkha.
Sloth, sometimes thought of as apathy, snuffs
out enthusiasm and concern for all things
spiritual. Torpor follows suit.
The mind and body are tied up by these states and
when tied up we stumble around aimless,
weary and with little effort to do anything.
We want to "give-in" and "give-up." We feel lazy.
Lethargy and sluggishness weigh us down in such a way
we are lost in it. The work you did yesterday now
looks tedious and boring. You feel drained to the
point of saying, "WHY BOTHER!"
To recover does not mean to convert to striving.
Rather it is to meet what comes without succumbing
to the sense of a futile and burned out effort. And it is
to meet what shows up no matter how lazy, sluggish
your mind is. It's not merely fatigue from no sleep, if
you are tired get some rest.
This sloth and torpor is when you feel down, down,
down to the point every step you take feels like you are
wearing leaded shoes.
One way to remedy this painful pull is when the there
is a task that comes your way do it
despite how you feel. Don't analyze, meet what moves
you along in the day. You have to eat, drink water, clean-up,
use the bathroom, answer the phone, pay bills,
go to work and so on.
You feel like hell because you are living in what your mind
sees as quicksand; unable to go and do anything except perhaps
scream about how stuck and bored you are.
Ring a bell and go and do whatever the bell calls you to do.
You'll still feel like hell, but go and do it anyway.
